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Why?

Life seemed to be so confusing. And more and more confusing day by day.
Maybe they were who made it so confusing.

They still were so hiding while so out, too. Actually none understood what was happening between them, maybe not even them.
And they made it so difficult to all around them, too.
Maybe their deals and agreements and the new and new wishes and rules were too hard to understand even for themselves.

He didn't know how he could explain. Maybe from the start?
First there was the hate and then that kiss. Then the more and more fights, sometimes against each other, sometimes for kisses or hugs.
Then came that prom where they were announced as dates.
He could not forget the disapproval in his dad's eyes.
More when he explained the next day that they don't even date and have anything between them, neither they want.
And then the requests for sleepovers still. Keep explaining and proving and asking for trust.
He had no idea what changed, around and in them.
They did not fight anymore, but their tease and provoking each other was same harsh or even worse than the fights before.

He scratched his head, thinking, wondering all these and trying to sum things up in his diary.
He wrote two columns like pro and contra as he listed the rules.
Like no dating just kissing, holding hands. While they slept together.
Those other stuff belong to when they become adult and for true love, who they still need to find.
Not sharing stuff with others but making sure none believes they date.
None of them can date anyone else either and they talk about everyone that flirts and they must share feelings.

He scratched his head again, all these were so contradictory. They had more and more rules that kind of stopped improving anything outside, but also between them.
He felt so frustrated that he was sure now of a coming fight.
But for now he grabbed the little bag from under his mattress and left to find Tomas.